Today I tried to make myself an appointment. I was met with a friendly lady to my face type of person, but when I asked her nicely to call me by my authentic name of Cynthia, she blatantly kept calling me Cindy. Now I don’t have a problem with my nickname I received as a young child, but my problem here is with people disregarding my wishes. If a person wishes to be called something different than what people typically will try to call them, I feel people need to follow the other person’s wishes. This shows respect and love. Since I’ve changed my name to my birth name, I’ve had about 10-15% of the people who I ask to call me by Cynthia, turn around and be negative about it.
My point in writing this is not to complain about these experiences. But my point is to show how I and others can bring in the light of healing to this experience by way of changing how we think of these situations and using the Ho’Oponopono technique.
These experiences have made me angry each time they happen. This shows me that I’m receiving behavior from others that crosses my personal boundaries. People that continually cross my personal boundaries are people who I do not care to be around. When I see bad behavior in others, and I react to it, I take a closer look at the bad behavior that was shown to me. We all act as mirrors in each other’s lives. So, looking closer at this experience, I have learned that I have not been rude to others regarding them changing their name. But, I have seen where I have blatantly rebelled against someone just because I didn’t want to listen to them.
Realizing that I also have used my shadow side of my Rebel archetype towards others, I am able to ‘heal this”. This is what we call “Shadow working”. To heal this means, we bring this shadow behavior in to the light. I have already acknowledged that I also have had similar bad behavior. This is a start to bringing the behavior in to the light.
After I have calmed down and I have noticed similar behavior in my past, I will finish healing it by using an ancient Hawaiian love technique called Ho’Oponopono. By using this ancient love technique, I’ll not only be healing myself, but when I start to heal of this, it also acts to stimulate other people in healing this behavior. Remember, we are all connected. When one person starts to heal themselves, it tends to act like a domino effect on others and stimulate others to do the same. Now just because I have acknowledged the bad behavior in someone else an in myself and I do the ancient love technique, doesn’t mean I can forget all about the behavior. This means, the Universe will hold me 100% responsible if I continue in doing this bad behavior(Karma). Why? Because I am aware I am doing it. Now let’s clean our subconscious minds with using Ho’Oponopono technique.
When we use the Ho’Oponopono technique, we are talking to our Inner child. This inner child is also your Divine self and your subconscious mind. When we talk to our Divine selves, we use respect and love. For our Divine selves are sacred. When we clean our subconscious minds, we need to remember that our inner child-our inner, young child, has lived with whatever memory we have of each experience we’ve been in. So, thinking back, find all your memories of horrific, abusive, and mean experiences. Why? Because we are protecting our young inner child from having to live with these horrific memories. The subconscious mind is like a computer. It remembers everything you have ever experienced in this life-even if you have forgotten consciously. To keep negative memories in your subconscious mind is to let your inner child continuously relive through them, every day of your life.
So, with these ideas in mind, we continue with Ho’Oponopono technique. It is easy to do, you just need to do it. So, let’s name the behavior or experience we want to erase. I’ve been treated badly regarding my name change. But when I looked at myself regarding this bad behavior, I have found that I too have done similar bad behavior. The bad behavior was to rebel against others just because I didn’t want to do what they asked me to do. Rebelling against a positive suggestion. So, this was acknowledging my own bad behavior from the past. Now using the Ho’Oponopono technique and with great respect and love, I say these words either out loud or in my head. “Cynthia, let’s clean house. Please find all the information and memories regarding Me rebelling against a person asking me to do something that I really didn’t want to do. Please find all the information and memories and I ask you to release it all up to God to be neutralized, erased, and healed. I am so sorry, please forgive me, I love you, and I thank you. I am so sorry, please forgive me, I love you, and I thank you. I am so sorry, please forgive me, I love you, and I thank you.” “I let it go.”
That’s it! You just used this ancient love technique to heal your own bad behavior. Why do we say all the apologies? Remember, you’re talking to your Divine self, your inner child. You are apologizing for not spending much time with your inner child and for acknowledging your inner child. Remember, you’re talking to yourself at maybe age 4 years old. You let your inner child know, you are her/him, all grown up. You are there to take care of yourself-inner child. Your parents may still be alive, but you are now your inner child’s parent to protect them, to play, to talk to them and to love them. Let your inner child know all this. Typically, I would say a lot of people do not acknowledge themselves as a young child still inside of themselves (Child archetype). Even though we are grown up, doesn’t mean you lose that child that stays safe and hidden inside of you. Bad behavior that comes out of us, at times, can be from our inner child. An inner child that is showing a person they need attention, healing, and some love. So be gentle with this being inside of you. The” I love you” in the technique is to show your affection to this priceless child. “I thank you” is to let them know you are thankful for them being a part of your life. For helping you heal the memories in you that need to be healed. Thanking your inner child/subconscious mind/Divine self for releasing these memories up to God. In this way, your inner child does not need to be around these bad memories. Treat your inner child as you would treat any other young child-with love, respect, and protection.
In our daily lives, we need to find time to play, give ourselves attention, love, and respect. Don’t forget about our Divine selves as a child. This child remains in us, waiting for you attention, love and play!
So, as we follow our paths in life, we meet people. Each person that we meet will either teach us or we will teach them. My negative experience has taught me that I too have some shadows to heal. I ask you to follow your paths and if you come upon someone that gets you upset in anyway, take a closer look at the bad experience. Ask yourself, is it possible that you too have done something similar in life? We all act as mirrors to each other. It is up to us to realize this and to take the opportunity to heal ourselves-bring in the light. When we heal ourselves, we bring our best, most loving self into the world. And when we enter the world as our “best” versions, we also can heal the world, one person at a time.
By Cynthia Bergsbaken RM of Reiki in the Prairie LLC