Grudges-Are They Worth the Price?

We only have a certain amount of time given to us on earth.  Some less where as some have more time.  We are not given the date of our deaths.  With this said, why would we choose to bring darkness in to our lives and the world? 

Conflict.  What is conflict towards others?  Having a serious disagreement.  Holding on to grudges.  When we choose to hold on to bitterness, resentments, anger and hate, we are embracing darkness in our lives and the world.  When we choose to embrace the darkness, we turn our backs on love. 

When the disagreement turns in to a long-standing resentment, the person involved will pay a high price for making this choice along with others.

I’ve been around people who have said, “I will never forgive So-n-So for what he/she did to me.”  Does this sound familiar?   The price this person will pay may not be seen in the present moment but will be noticed years later or when he/she has passed.  The pain and suffering that is felt by both parties is tremendous.

I’ve been around people who have totally ignored/abandoned parts of their family due to conflict/grudges.
The price we pay for holding on to disagreements?

In an energetic/physical aspect, as a person holds on to grief, anger, and/or hate the person will start to form an energy blockage in for example their heart chakra (chest region).  The longer the resentment is held on to, the more blocked the chakra is.  The blockage over time will create physical disease in the area of the affected chakra.  In this case-in the chest area.

In an emotional aspect, as a person holds on to grief, anger, and/or hate he/she will experience emotional suffering continually.  As in physical pain, emotional pain will also slowly change your actions and thinking to being negative.  Think of that old uncle or old aunt who is continually bad mouthing everyone and everything.  They are clearly embracing the “darkness” with their suffering.  The longer the person holds on to this conflict, the longer the person suffers.  And so, by holding on to the conflict, the person not only hurts him/herself, but also God and loved ones around him/her.  God?  Because we live our lives within God and Gold lives his/her life within us.   Others around us?  Read on.

Now let’s look at the emotional aspect in a different light.  When someone decides to hold on to a grudge against someone else, they have elected to place glass walls around themselves.    The walls act to “protect” the person from further pain from the other person.  When we wall off ourselves from people, we basically have taken the other person out of our life.  We are ignoring them / we have abandoned them.  You ask, “What is wrong with that?”

Picture and think about this.
Humor me now.  

Picture yourself as a crossed-over spirit, that held a long standing grudge to a relative.  You decide to visit your family, relatives and others you enjoyed being around.  Since you are spirit now without your earthly emotions, you realize that you really did love that relative you had a disagreement with.  You want to let them know you really did care and love them.  The grudge was from pride, not taking responsibility for your actions and wanting to be right.  You know this because you feel it deep down in your heart.  You have regrets for holding on to this grudge.  You missed out in getting to know this relative in his/her earthly life due to a grudge.  You missed out on creating loving memories.

 And so, you visit the relative’s house to tell them that you were sorry. You go in the house and try to speak to the person.  He/she cannot hear you, due to you being a spirit.  You try to communicate anyway you can.  The person cannot hear you.  You have no way of making amends consciously and directly to the person.

As you stand their watching this person, you realize that this person is in deep pain caused by the grudge you held for them.  This relative has deep sorrow in his/her heart-chest area. The pain is so intense that you can barely stand to be around him/her due to the feeling. The grudge, in your human life, had caused you to talk ill of this relative to others.  This has swayed other relatives to feel negative towards this person also.  And so, there is a domino effect in negative actions and thoughts towards this person.  Thus, relatives decide to ignore and abandon this family member.  No loving memories, no family support, love, and no kindness. 

And so, both of you remain behind a glass wall.  You as a spirit, looking to communicate forgiveness, but cannot.   

The other person behind a glass wall looking in at the relatives that once were accepting of him/her, wanting to make loving memories with his/her earthly relatives is unable to.

Grudges take away love and loving moments we have on earth.  Grudges take away loving experiences that we all crave for in life.  Grudges/conflict hurt not only us in a physical, emotional, and spiritual way, but they have a domino effect on everyone around us.

This story was to illustrate how each side may feel when negativity is held.  Negativity in the form of a grudge, will rob each one of us of our birth right-love
Why wait until you have crossed-over to realize you have caused much pain and suffering to yourself and others due to some conflict with someone. 

Tell the person you’re having a conflict with, “I forgive you. I love you.” If you cannot in person, try imaging this person in front of you.  Now say their name and say the words, “I forgive you.  I love you.” Communicate! Then feel the conflict dissolve away and love re-entering in to your heart, your life.  Now after you forgive the other person, it’s time to tell yourself, “I forgive myself.  I love myself.”

Grudges = pain, suffering, energetic stagnation, disease, and loss of making loving memories with people in our lives.

Forgiveness=facing our pain, freedom, healthy energetic flow of energy, the ability to make loving memories with people in our lives and gives us back the ability to love ourselves and others.

By Cynthia Bergsbaken of Reiki in the Prairie LLC
Written for The Perceptive Blogger
January 2019

***All original content is copyrighted by Cynthia Bergsbaken, Perceptive Blogger & Reiki in the Prairie LLC.
Reiki in the Prairie LLC is a legal Entity under law,  2015.
April 11, 2020
Plagiarism is a crime.  If you would like to share an article or photo from Reiki in the Prairie LLC and Cynthia Bergsbaken, please obtain written permission from Cynthia Bergsbaken.  Send a email to

I am honored to have your interest in my writings & photos.  But to steal one's work is a crime and is disrespectful. Use your inspiration to create your own works with your  own experiences and your own words.
-Cynthia Bergsbaken

Reiki in the Prairie LLC, April 11, 2020


Popular Posts